| You're the last thing on my mind when I go to sleep and the first thing I think about as the sun rises in the morning...
that's how i feel about you.
but sometimes i feel like you dont feel the same.
i question myself, what did I do wrong to make you not love me the way you used to.
you dont do the things you used to, you dont tell me the same things you used to.
and i always ask myself, "am i that horrible of a person?"
i dont think i am.
im very fair.
i react like who anyone would react.
but you just seem so distant and un-interested.
and i fought so hard to be the best i can be, but it seems like it's not working.
im the wrong one
and not you.
why is that?
why do i have to be the horrible person???
when all i have done is nothing but to try to make you happy, and not worry about myself.
is that fair?
is that right?
i want the old you back.
i want my baby,
i dont have you anymore.
that makes me scared and sad.
and all i could ask myself is
what went wrong?
i still love you unconditionally.
nothing has changed.
but do you love me the same???
you say you do, but you dont show it.
actions speak louder than words.
i want you, i want you back
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| life is an interesting journey... It takes you to so many unsuspecting twists and turns. My life has had a lot of twists and turns...some good some bad...but most importantly i brought them on myself. Im not the greatest of people. I hurt too many people in the time of a year. Im not proud of that. If i could take everything back i would...but i cant. I just have to live with it and learn from my stupidity...i changed. For the better. I am not the person i was before and im happy about that. I dont even recognize who i was back then. And thats a good thing. But now i guess im just letting people step all over me to repay my past mistakes. I think im doing a good thing. Sometimes you dont know wat you say hurts me. You dont know wat you do hurts me. You hide things from me. You dont think its a big deal, but like you always told me its the little things that count. I just cant lose you. I feel empty without you. Nothing else matters. I dunno. Im just hurt... |
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| i must say...
im pretty content on how things are going.
there are days when i just wanna shoot everyone because they are stupid, or i believe they shouldnt be on the earth anymore...i know thats horrible to say...very horrible actually...but i dont care. people piss me off that much sometimes.
im not good at controlling my anger. so what?
but...finals are coming up...i hate school.
but you gotta do it...
he is the only person i dont want to shoot when im mad at him...
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| "you never realize what you have until you lost it." I almost lost it, but i realized what great thing i had long before the loss.
i really do believe that we are meant for each other and we will be very happy together, but we can never give up. when you seem to lose all hope, try to regain it, because in the end it will all be worth it. just never give up. fight for what you want and who you love. i do. i am always here for you, i love you. |
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